Tag Archives: Jersey Shore Italy

"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 12

Gone from Italy but never forgotten

Meatball+kooka sweat=this ginger gags.

That’s the equation I came up with to describe the Season 4 finale of “Jersey Shore.” It’s not Good Will Hunting writing on the chalkboard, but it will do for this post.

The finale was anti-climactic. The gang got drunk, tried to hook up with grenades, toured Florence’s sights, and talked about getting tan in Jersey. Now that I think about it: What REALLY happened in the Season 4 finale? Did I yawn throughout?

I need a six-hour energy drink, or two, to make sense of this cluster. Wink, wink at Deena and Sammi “Nada Sweetheart.” Way to shill, ladies. Stay energized!

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"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 10

No. I don't have photos of Deena's kooka.

Depending on your perspective, MTV’s “Jersey Shore” has either had its occasional low points or been one continuous low point. I am an unabashed fan of the show, and thus I would say it has had occasional low points, most of which were caused by Ronnie and Sammi “Nada Sweetheart”‘s constant bickering in Seasons 2 and 3.

Episode 10 featured the lowest moment in series history, in my humble opinion, and it had nothing to do with the castmates. It involved MTV’s decision to splice a Beavis and Butthead promo into a conversation Vinny had with his family.

I wanted to throat-punch MTV executives and claw my eyes out. Simultaneously. What in the name of Deena’s flea-bitten kooka were they trying to pull with that one?

I will leave that question unanswered. Besides revealing MTV’s utter contempt for its “Jersey Shore” audience, Episode 10 showed broken-hearted Snooki, in what has become one of Season 4’s main plotlines, lashing out at Snitchuation and trying to make up with her boyfriend, Lil Jionni.

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"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 8

No. I don't have photos of Deena's kooka.

Deena’s kooka, Deena’s kooka, Deena’s kooka …

… Snooki’s kooka, Snooki’s kooka, Snooki’s kooka.

All this meatball kooka is going to cause my Cajun head to explode. Notice: I spelled kooka correctly this week. Last week I came in first on Yahoo! and Google searches for Deena’s cooka, a term I misspelled.

My goal this week is to attain the top slot for Snooki’s kooka. It’s probably a long shot, like the odds of Jionni and Snooki’s relationship working after the events of Episode 8.

Here are my thoughts on an episode full of tears, bad dancing, and, you guessed it, kooka sightings.

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"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 6

"Jersey Shore": My new/old addiction

“Jersey Shore” has taught viewers important lessons over the years like how to execute the perfect fist pump, the virtues of GTL, and when it’s appropriate to hook up with a housemate (always). We’ve also learned that when you say your only rule is not to fall in love at the Shore you should probably keep that rule.

And this year is once again teaching us that if you are a juicehead gorilla — or any man — you have to know when to break up with your psychotic on again, off again bronzed nutjob — or lady friend. Thanks Ronnie for being a selfless teacher. :)

Episode 6 illustrated this lesson yet again with Ronnie and Sammi “Nada Sweetheart” pledging to give it one last try. At this point, they are treating viewers like special needs learners. Truth is they are special needs learners, when it comes to love.

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"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 5

"Jersey Shore": My new/old addiction

I blashphemed against the TV gods Sunday night. Somewhere, there is a commandment not to put “Jersey Shore” above “Breaking Bad” or “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” And I broke it. I compared MTV’s guidofest to the two aforementioned greats.

I’m not proud of this. Then again, I’m not backing down from my blasphemy, either. Sunday’s “Jersey Shore” made me scream like a hyena. There was also plenty of drama to supplement all the intentional and unintentional hilarity.

If there were a Mount Rushmore of current TV shows, my four picks would be: Bryan Cranston of “Breaking Bad,” Larry David of “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” Louis CK of “Louie,” and Pauly D of “Jersey Shore.” (Gotta go with Pauly! The blowout would look awesome on the side of a mountain!)

And now for a gigantic waste of time in 3, 2, guido … PS: There will be spoilers! Act like you know! :)

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"Jersey Shore" — Season 4, Episode 1

"Jersey Shore": My new/old addiction

The “Jersey Shore” housemates are my cigarettes. I want to quit them. I know they’re bad for me. They have polluted my brain for three seasons. And yet I can’t kick them. I am addicted. Hopelessly addicted.

I managed to wait four days after Season 4’s premiere before viewing it. I can promise that won’t happen with future episodes. From what I saw from the season preview and what I have read about the season online, I have decided there is no point fighting my addiction to “Jersey Shore.” Not at least until MTV makes wholesale changes to the cast after Season Five, which has already been filmed.

Below are my thoughts about “Jersey Shore”: Season 4, Episode 1. It was not the best “Jersey Shore” episode I have seen, but as an introductory episode it succeeded in illustrating just how far out of their element the castmates are/were.

WARNING: If you have not seen the first episode, you probably should stop reading here.

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